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You Were Called to Be a Mother, Not a Martyr

May 15, 2024

Definition: Martyr - A martyr is someone who sacrifices their own needs, desires, and well-being for the sake of others, often to an extreme or unhealthy degree.

 

Hey Ladies,

I want to start by reminding you of something incredibly important: you were called to be a mother, not a martyr. In a world where it often feels like we need to do it all and be it all, I'm here to tell you that it's okay to let go of that burden.

It's time to empower ourselves to shift our current situation to one that we desire. And one of the most effective ways to do this is by bringing our families in on the journey. It's time to delegate tasks and responsibilities, and not just any tasks, but age-appropriate ones that allow our children to contribute meaningfully to the family unit.

 

But I understand that letting go of control can be difficult. We've been taught that as mothers, we need to do everything ourselves. But I'm here to challenge that notion. It's okay to ask for help. It's okay to delegate tasks to capable family members. It's okay to take some things off your plate.

 

And perhaps most importantly, it's okay to acknowledge when we've been taught wrong. But the beauty is, it's never too late to change the trajectory. Our actions and reflections as mothers don't just affect our daughters; they also set the tone for our sons. They learn from us how to treat, love, appreciate, and respond to the needs of the women in their lives

So let's lead by example. Let's show our sons as well what it means to be a supportive partner and parent. Let's teach them to listen to the needs of others and to participate in cultivating a healthy family unit. Because one day, they will be someone's husband, and the lessons they learn from us will shape the kind of partner and parent they become.

 

So, fellow mothers, I encourage you to embrace the title of mother wholeheartedly, but let go of the martyrdom. You deserve to live a life filled with joy, fulfillment, and support. And by letting go of the burden of doing it all, you pave the way for a brighter future for yourself and your family.

 

I was born to a single mother, and for much of my upbringing, I was partially raised by my older sister. Both my mother and sister moved through life with a sense of martyrdom, constantly sacrificing their own needs and desires for the sake of others. They meant well and did what they knew, but I couldn't shake the feeling that something was missing as I became a mother myself.

 

Growing up in a household where martyrdom was the norm, I internalized the belief that as a mother, I, too, was meant to sacrifice myself. But as I navigated my own journey into motherhood, I began to question this narrative. Why did I always have to sacrifice myself simply because I had become a mother?

 

Yes, we want the best for our children. Yes, we want to provide for them. And I am all for it, I am the first to say that I work every day to create a solid foundation and lasting legacy for my family. However, sacrifice doesn't mean surrender; it doesn't mean surrendering your being, your dreams, or your wellness.

It was through this questioning that I came to realize the importance of rejecting the martyrdom mindset. I realized that being a mother doesn't mean losing yourself in the process. It doesn't mean neglecting your own needs and desires for the sake of others.

Instead, being a mother is about finding balance. It's about recognizing that your well-being is just as important as the well-being of your children. It's about setting boundaries, asking for help when you need it, and prioritizing self-care.

 

So, fellow mothers, I urge you to challenge the notion of martyrdom. You deserve to live a life filled with joy, fulfillment, and support. And by embracing your role as a mother without sacrificing yourself in the process, you pave the way for a brighter future for yourself and your family.

 

Reply to this blog, I'd love to know your thoughs.

Wishing you and amazing time in reflection and navigating your way. WE can do it together

I'm here cheereing you on, "I do it for my HOOD...MotherHOOD"

 

With much love and solidarity,

Timeka Stredick

“Your Simplicity Cultivator”