Parenting In a Pandemic

Parenting In a Pandemic

Parenting in a Pandemic

Let me start by saying hats off to you!!!! Parenting through a pandemic is new for everyone. With all the uncertainties going on if you’re reading this, you are still standing. In all honesty, just in the last few weeks your normal has been totally shifted. I mean y’all out here cooking, disinfecting, washing, working, doing area model math, cooking, and did I say cooking????

But seriously I give honor where honor is due. If no one has told you already, you are doing a GREAT job. It doesn’t matter if you take small breaks to gather yourself, between assignments so you don't get overwhelmed. You have been getting in the ring every day and you keep showing up. That deserves an applause.
 

Think about it, the family unit is more “together” than it’s ever been in our lifetime. I know it’s different, and cabin fever may seem just around the corner, but find the bright side. Yes, you, your spouse and kids are all and home confined, but everyone is safe and healthy. Take this time to ask God what He wants you to do during this time. Ask him what He wants you to see, what you can learn, and how your family can become stronger and closer through all of this.

Just maybe, have you considered that God may want to restore some of the breached areas of the family unit? Think of all the practice, games, tournaments, meetings, long days at the office, honey I’ll be home late from work, we all had a lot going on. Look, even if “Honey” is still working outside of the home, "Honey" will be coming straight home from work these days.

With most cities issuing a “stay home order,” allowing you to only leave for essential needs, this is eliminating all the excuses that keep us from spending time with each other. I’m not saying that any of these previously mentioned tasks are bad things, they are a major part of our lives. Just remember that even a good reason can become an excuse if we allow it to. All that busyness was a part of the world we lived not so long ago, talking about what a difference a day makes is an understatement. Let me ask you something. How well do you really know your family? Well, there is no time like the present to find out.

God said in Genesis 1:28 be fruitful (producing good or helpful results) and multiply (increase greatly in number), replenish (restore to a former level or condition) the earth and subdue (bring under control by force) it. Have we been so busy being busy that we have failed to be productive, especially in these areas?

Yes, education is important, but what do our children really know? Do they have common sense or how are they with conflict resolution? What about life skills, can they cook, do the laundry, or mow the lawn? How is their integrity and their character? This question is probably the biggest of them all, do they know God for themselves? What do we really know about them? Yes, these are all loaded questions. But the great thing about right now is that we have nothing but time to dig deep in any of these necessary areas.

I asked God what his plans are concerning my boys. Show me their gifts, who He called them to be in the world. I asked God to teach my husband and me to be the parents who guard them, guides them in a way to help them flourish, and cultivate those gifts which he planted on the inside of them. They are not our property, but God has given them to us to steward, not to make mini carbon copies of ourselves. As parents we had to be willing to be stretched individually and collectively. We also had to unlearn some old ideas to make room for the new ideas.Yes, it is easiest to teach them to do everything just the way you do, and to enjoy only the things that interest you but in the long run, most often it doesn’t work out as intended. When we allow our children to express themselves, they find their voice and begin to gain confidence at an early age. Now let me put a disclaimer right here. When I say express themselves, of course, we still set boundaries, require them to be respectful, and apply consequences as needed. That’s a WHOLE other blog post!

When you’re with your children pay attention to what they like, things they are drawn to and their tendencies. All boys don’t have to be a quarterback in the NFL nor do all girls have to be a ballerina from Julliard, unless that's what on the inside of them. There is so much more out there to explore. As you pray, let God lead you and let your children show you. I promise you will begin to see little things when you lean in and look a little closer.

When you look at the grand scope of life, you were someone’s child at one time. Maybe your parents helped you cultivate the person on the inside of you, maybe they didn’t. If you didn’t have this legacy for yourself, you can be the first to start it for generations to come. Either way, how great a gift to give your children’s children, a parent who is not trying to find themselves and raise them at the same time.

What looks like the most uncertain of times, turn it around and use it for your benefit. Bring out the classics. Play Monopoly, Uno, or Scrabble. Start that family bible study, teach them how to find scripture, and pray simple prayers. Use this time to blow bubbles with them, jump rope, a game of basketball, hopscotch, or better yet jacks! I bet they don’t know anything about JACKS!

I don’t want you to feel like you are alone, because EVERY family is trying to figure out what to do during these times. Plus, I am in theses trenches right along with you. Trial and error are a part of the game here. Most importantly don’t allow this pandemic to drive you apart, but start each day being intentional to become closer as a family unit.

Until we chat again, show yourself some grace, choose to be very good to yourself
& keep showing up!

Sending you virtual hugs
Timeka💙

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